Op-Ed: If I had the choice to be gay or lesbian, I would be ...

Opinion | Adam Goldberg | April 6, 2016

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Op-Ed: If I had the choice to be gay or lesbian, I would be lesbian.

Selfie

I’m more than happy being a boy that likes girls, but if I had the choice to be gay or lesbian, I would be lesbian. 100%. Easiest decision I’ve ever made in my life.

Why? Umm let’s see: WOMEN’S LOCKER ROOMS. Aka paradise. Only then would I be able to see Kelsi Diego, the hottest girl in the entire middle school. We could talk about bra sizes and underwear–what girls typically talk about. 

Picture this: I’m a girl with hot body and I’m  wearing just a robe. I would freakin stand in the mirror with just a robe and flash myself!

Playing Xbox must be awesome too. I can play Call of Duty and just poke my boob for good luck.

I could just stare at my naked body all day and I’d be all about it. It’s so damn easy to be a lesbian too. 

“Oh no, two girls are kissing! Call the police!” Yeah, said no one ever. 

-Mikey